So to illustrate what my dating life usually looks like, in the first eleven months since B. and I broke up, I had one date. It kind of fell apart after we had this conversation (pretty much in the first ten minutes):
Him: What kind of music do you like?
Me: I don’t really listen to music. It’s just background noise to me, generally.
Me: What kind of books do you like?
Him: I don’t read books.
And then I came to Salt Lake City and had five dates in the span of four weeks. (That’s where OKCupid comes in.) Of the five
- one was fun, but then he stopped texting, so that’s unfortunate
- one was fine but forgettable
- one was fun, I don’t think there’s any long-term potential there but we had a lot to talk about
- one went pretty well, at first. He’s a Mormon (kind of unavoidable here), and we had a great, rational, very calm discussion on the differences in our beliefs and cultures (he did his mission in Germany/Austria and even knew a little Dutch, so that was great). But then, but then I made the mistake of asking him where he stood on gay marriage, and when he said he was opposed, I…lost it and we had a very heated debate. (Seriously, I am very laid back and I find cultural and religious differences more interesting than alarming, but if you sit there and tell me from a position of privilege that you don’t think everyone has a right to love who they want, I will get upset.) So I don’t think that’s going anywhere.
- and that leaves one. We went to the Natural History Museum here, which is a really great museum. He’s a biologist and I tried really hard not to ask stupid questions, seeing as I don’t really understand science. He was nice, we had a lot to talk about, and although I know it doesn’t sound that spectacular I’m counting it as the best date I’ve had so far. We’ve made plans for next week, and I’m feeling very cautiously optimistic.
I’m thinking American dating culture is more to blame (or reward? I don’t know) rather than any charms I might have, as I have no idea what I’m doing with this dating thing and it is very unlike me to get this much attention. But hey, at least it gets me out of the house and imitating a social life, so you know, that’s good.